Welcome to The Dissonance Diaries

Hello musicians and music lovers,

We all have our own relationship with music. Some of us are performers, some educators. Some might simply admire music from afar. Maybe you took lessons as a kid and gave it up after a bad experience. No matter who you are, where you started, or where you’ve ended up — this space is for you.

I started violin when I was five. Funnily enough, I didn’t even want to play violin. I thought a clarinet was a flute and was determined that was the instrument for me. But I was a tiny child, and the music store owner gently redirected me toward the miniature violins on the wall. And that’s where it all began.

I started lessons with an older woman in the small town where I grew up — $5 a lesson, paid by my grandpa. My love for music grew from there. Fast forward to high school, and despite music being nearly all I did, I had no idea what to do with it. I wasn’t naturally gifted. I had performance anxiety. My technique was lacking. My teacher at the time didn’t believe I could make it as a music major.

Still, I went for it.

I got into a state university for violin performance — and two years later, I was offered full-ride scholarships to nearly every school I auditioned for.

Since then, I’ve worn every hat in the music world: performer (solo, orchestra, chamber, pit, theater), teacher, recording engineer, arts administrator, manager — all of it.

And here’s the truth: it’s not the fairy tale I imagined as a kid.

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So Why The Dissonance Diaries?

Classical music, while beautiful, is a complicated world. Elitist. Rigid. Often misogynistic, racist, ageist, and resistant to change. A world that is, in many ways, dying — or perhaps choosing to die, strangled by outdated ideals.

The traditions we’re taught to revere are rarely questioned, and when they are, the consequences can be social exile or professional risk.

That’s why I created The Dissonance Diaries.

This blog is a space to shine light on the black cats and broken mirrors of the classical world. A place for the truth — about what it’s really like to build a career in this industry, and what we were never taught in school.

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Who Is This Blog For?

If you’re someone who’s been made to feel like you don’t belong, like you’re not good enough, like there’s no place for you in this art form — this blog is for you.

If you’re curious about the behind-the-scenes of the music world, if you want change, if you’re ready for honest conversations — you’re in the right place.

As an educator, I want the next generations of musicians to see a way forward. Not everyone should have to endure hundreds of auditions to feel valid. Not everyone should give up on lessons because they “aren’t good enough.” And no one — especially those who’ve endured grooming, misogyny, or racism in music — should feel silenced or alone.

This is your space, too.

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Join Me

Let’s pull back the curtain together.
Let’s talk.
Let’s be dissonant.

🖋 Nicole

Got an idea for a blog post or someone you’d love for me to interview?
Email me at [email protected] — I’d love to hear from you.